Sharks & Beavers Edition

And you can try and change, but that’s just the top layer / Mane, you was who you was for you got here...

~ Jay-Z / PSA ~

One of my friends was new to seeing me perform. I was waiting for her to say my onstage  energy surprised her, since many folks describe “normal me” as chill. But she didn’t. She just complimented it. When I told her about the usual feedback, she just shrugged and hit me with the following analogy:

“When a shark swims around in its shark world doing its shark things, it moves a certain way. But when a shark “smells” blood in the water, it doesn’t transform into something else. It just becomes a different version of itself. It’s feast time, but it’s still a shark though.” She said, “Onstage you just smell blood...”

I rock heavily with that analogy and jack it all the time to tell folks, “Nah lil ole frito head shaped bwoy. I been a shark!” And that’s true. Me onstage, or in certain aspects of my craft, is just me in shark transitions. It’s quick maff. But then again, sometimes the arithmetic is off...

I hang on to the comparison mostly because it was to a “shark”. It would have hit different if she said, “Nah. You’re always a beaver. It’s just sometimes you be waddling along in your lil beaver-backed body in your lil beaver world and beaver-you sees a tree and beavers-up to build a helluva dam.” If she woulda hit me with that, I woulda blocked her on all the social medias.

But truth be told, I sometimes DO beaver body it and even in “shark situations”. I have pride in my savoir faire, but on occasion, I’m just not in the pocket. That’s kosher though. I’m finding greater peace in awkwardness. As I said in a previous lyric “to be part of your circle, I’d have to lose my edge”. Besides, nowadays, I’m finding that I’m more about building than eating anyway. #beaverup